Monday, May 1, 2017

Lets do this!!

Hello world!  Wow, so it's been a....while. Lol March of 2014 was my last post?!?  Can that be right?!?  INsane.  It really is true that the older you get, the faster time flies by. I've fallen off the wagon and started over many, many times since my last post. Every time seeming to lose a little bit more confidence in myself and whether I could ever get back to where I was, much less ever really hit my 100 lb weight loss goal.  You start to just ....doubt yourself and wonder if that person that lost 70lbs and was doing Crossfit (albeit, slowly lol) was all a dream.  You start to wonder if at 36, or 37, maybe you're just meant to be morbidly obese.  That it's just not in you to do it anymore. You start to wonder if you should consider surgery and all of the risks and side effects that go along with it.   It's a very low place to be.  Don't get me wrong.  I wasn't depressed or anything.  Just very sad every time I had to look in a mirror, put on clothes, take off clothes, buy clothes, sit in a small chair, run out of breath going up and down my stairs, move my husbands hand off my fat rolls, tie my shoes, put away favorite outfits that I could no longer pretend I fit into...you get the idea.  Life was great except for all that!  Lol  Somehow I kept trying "1 more time."  And guys, I think I've finally found a program/coach/team that I can not only stick with, but I am learning life lessons from and learning to change my way of thinking.  I'm learning little by little that I am stronger in body and MIND than I realized.  It's only been 4 weeks with my new coach but I am still so very motivated and optimistic!  Quitting is not even a thought in my head and I have had less 'cheats' and 'oops' than ever!  I'm working out 6 days a week and feeling so freakin' good for it!!  Even though I haven't quite seen the change on the outside yet, the changes that are taking place on the inside are many and even more important!  I'm down 10 lbs for the month of April alone and can't wait to see what May brings! Today I took a ton of "before" pics and it suuuucked.  I can't believe it has gotten so out of hand BUT I know I will be so glad I have these pics in a few months when the changes really start to show!  I'll post them here for sure! :)  I'm definitely going to be posting more here on my blog because I don't want to blow up everyones facebook feed!  Hopefully someone out there is reading, but even if you aren't....this is a great way for me to journal the details of my journey!  Happy May, guys! 


I don't really have a current body pic (besides this mornings and I'm not ready to share aaaaaalll of that lol)  but here I am working out with Micheal a couple weeks ago....ugh....my truth....
XOXO,
a